Leters to Militant Geek
I'm no hard-core computer geek, but I felt especially outcasted by my high school, which is one of the most important geek-determinant factors, I think. For me, it was the difference in brains, the delight found in weirdness and the overweight body contrasting to a school that worships cheerleading and football over anything else (case and point - we have a $4 million football stadium and a school whose roof leaks in multiplemulitple places and has a zillion mismatched floor tiles and no climate control whatsoever, and probably a little bit of asbestos just for garnish).
Cliques were everything. Sicksicksick. I could never be my whole self. If I was, the "looks" and whispering turned me into Instant Shrinking Violet. I never felt comfortable enough to say, "Hey man, I'm damn cool! Get down on your knees and worship this goddess!" Ah, such a tale of woe. But, that's my qualification, if it can be considered as such. I've ranted enough.
~Tasha
p.s. I guess some of the acidity of my feelings is a bit hypocritical, 'cause school did have its moments for me...but the hurt is permanent, and it was fully justified in my mind, so tra la.
Thanks, Tasha! Unfortunately, I think your experiences are typical. This is the kind of crap we go through in our formative years. Makes us stronger, maybe, but not any happier. Now at least we can say "Hey man, I AM damn cool!"
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